This blog post is important to me because it’s the first time I get to say that I have sources. Everything sounds better when you say “sources say”.
It doesn’t even have to be true, it just sounds true when you say that. For example:
“Sources say eating gummy bears cures erectile disfunction.”
Not an ounce of truth to it, but it sounds good. You’d click that. Damn right you’d click that.
In this instance, I have actual sources who are saying actual things. The Oakdale is rising. Get in while the getting is good.
So without further delay, sources say, Russellville will be getting a Burger King and Huddle House.
“Shut the front door Chief! Is this real life?”
Real life fam.
Let’s start with Burger King because I’m giving this a 92.11% chance of being accurate. The location of this Whopper paradise is suppose to be in the Walmart area. This is a premiere location because there’s no better time to over pay for a cheese burger than right after you’ve dropped a few Ben Franks on groceries. Logan County has been praying for a fine dining restaurant for a longtime and alas, Burger King. Keep your O’Charleys, I’ll take a box of chicken fries and a Whopper over that all day everyday and twice on Sundays. McDonalds and Dairy Queen better stay woke, The King is coming.
Now for Huddle House. I’m giving this a 62.48% chance of being accurate. I was at 39.11% earlier today, but another source came hard in the paint and dunked all in my info dome today, so it gets a bump. They say it’s going to be located where the abandoned Pizza Hut is. Will they tear down and build or remodel? The anticipation is killing me.
If Waffle House is a normal trailer, Huddle House is a double wide. Similar menu, classier establishment. You asked for a sit down eatery that didn’t serve Mexican cuisine and Huddle House is answering your prayers. They check all the boxes. Hung over? Huddle House. Need a lunch time lift? Huddle House. Need a place to wow a first date? Huddle House.
You heard it all here first. What a time to be a Logan Countian. Before long we will be smashing MVP Breakfasts and ripping Whoppers. We are on the come up. Living our best life.
Next stop, Applebee’s.