It has been a busy week and I meant to do this sooner but, life ya know? Anyhow, I wanted to welcome the Colorado Avalanche to Nashville and perhaps give them a heads up on what’s to come. I wanted them to know what to expect so that maybe they wouldn’t run and cry to social media. Unfortunately, I didn’t get to them in time and things like this happened.

Welcome to Smashville. We play hockey loud. There’s something about sitting on your hands and pretending you are in a library that just doesn’t make sense when watching hockey. It feels like maybe you should make some noise and cheer your team on. Crazy right? Took me a while to adjust too. I recommend you try it though! Maybe if you were a little louder at your place, you wouldn’t need the final game of the regular season to make it into the playoffs.

We, the fans, aren’t loud because we don’t know what’s going on. That joke went out of style in the early 2000’s. We are loud because our team is putting the puck in the net more than yours. It is remarkable how it works actually. On the flip side of that if you would like to bring the decibels down, maybe your players should try to put more pucks in our net. I assume you didn’t know that seeings as how you couldn’t pull that little feat off all year.

Our chants are abrasive. I’m not sure what goes on in Colorado but around here we like to make things difficult for the opposition. I assume up there everyone gets high and pats each other on the back during the game. What would you like us to chant to make things better?

“Beeerrrnier, Beeerrrnier, you tried! And that’s what counts! And that’s what counts! And that’s what counts!”

No thanks snowflake.

The good news is after tomorrow you won’t have to come back. The Predators are going to drag your little overachieving team up and down the ice for the next three games and sweep you up at your place. This will all soon be a memory for you.

I can’t wait to see what goes on for the playoffs at the Pepsi Center. Is it a “golf clap only” zone? Do we all stand around and sing hymnals? Is it one big game of quiet mouse?

Sounds like a thrill. See ya there.